Too many young men are afraid to love.
They message me non stop, about how important it is to be tough. Need nothing or nobody.
Because love is need. And need is weakness.
Not only is this entirely unrealistic, its a pathetic goal.
If even partially completed, It would lead to nothing but misery. Humans are made to love. All of us. Especially the
Tough guys fight and die for what they LOVE. What else?
When I explained this to a young man today he asked the question “then how do I avoid being taken advantage of?”
If you want to think that way. This is what I would advise.
1) Love yourself first. You can not pour from an empty cup.
If you love yourself, you will build yourself.
And no matter what the object of your affection, your love is worth more if you’re a higher value man. This is the
Beautiful women want the love of rich powerful intelligent men.
Countries need the love of the strong and brave.
These are attributes which are honed. Love begins with you.
You are less likely to lose what you adore if you love and build yourself to begin with.
2) Love more than one thing. Or person. Because loss is inevitable. Time ensures this. Sooner or later everything you love will be dead and gone.
If it isnt, youll be dead and gone.
Maybe the woman you adore will leave you. Its possible.
And the easiest way to handle such a situation is to love your children or your work. To love yourself. In a life filled with love, a momentary loss is manageable.
3) LEARN TO ENJOY PAIN.
Its rare I feel sad. Im cerebral enough about myself to understand im only human and that feeling sad is normal and basically unimportant.
No body cares how I feel. The universe doesn’t care. The sun will continue to set and rise. If I jumped off a cliff, the world would continue unchanged. This is reality.
So why should I sit and ponder an absolute unimportance.
I don’t get wrapped up in the emotion or let it control me.
When I do feel sad, I play some sad music. Maybe have a cigar and I smile. SMILE.
I enjoy the feeling. Because this is part of being human, and you can train yourself to enjoy anything. Even heartache.
Its better than being dead. At least you feel SOMETHING.
Sooner or later the feeling will be gone, so I absolutely encourage you to enjoy the novelty of pain. You’re not special, how you feel isn’t special, but how you handle it can be.
I will love what I am sure to lose.
The worst day of my life, the day I can no longer shake hands with my brother is coming. There is no way to escape this reality.
And it will hurt.
But I love him just the same.
To avoid caring for him due to fear of loss is nothing more than COWARDICE.